COMING OUT STORY - BETHANY
For as long as I can remember I’ve been attracted to men and women.
I grew up in a very religious household where being gay was frowned upon. I was told that it was a sin.
I’ve hidden my true feelings all my life which has caused me so much anxiety and panic. Since I was a teenager I’ve suffered with panic attacks from hiding who I really was. I convinced myself that ‘coming out’ to my parents would cause them to disown me and not love me anymore. I never wanted to loose them, and that’s why I never felt like I could ‘come out’.
I couldn’t live with myself hiding my true feelings anymore. I lost my father suddenly in 2021 and it made me realise that life is so short and you have to make yourself happy regardless of what others think and believe.
I finally plucked up the courage to tell my mother a couple of months ago…. It was the hardest moment of my life. I broke down and cried hysterically before finally saying ‘Mam, I’m bisexual.’ I was waiting for her to shout and scream but she laughed and said, ‘Oh Bethany! Is that it?! Why on earth are you crying!’ - I felt completely at ease.
I explained to her that I never wanted to disappoint her or my father and I didn’t want to loose them. She comforted me and reassured me that I’d never loose her and she would never judge me, our relationship would never change.
Since coming out to my mother, I’ve began ‘coming out’ to my close friends and a couple of family members. But I finally feel confident enough to officially ‘come out’ by writing this. I’d like to say a big thank you to Rui and Bruno for asking me to be a part of their ‘Mom, I’m Coming Out’ stories.
For me it’s been such a scary time but I finally feel at peace with myself. If there’s one thing I can say from my experience it’s that life is short, you don’t know what’s around the corner and you have to put yourself first and love yourself for who you really are.
You can find Bethany’s journey on Instagram @wandering.welsh.girl